I’ve mentioned before that our
parents raised us to help people, and not for a pat on the back or to be put on
a pedestal. I love how Matthew 6:3 says “but when you give to the needy, do not
let your left hand know what your right hand is doing.” In addition to having
been taught to help people, we were also taught to say “thank you” and be
appreciative. I know that not everyone is as fortunate to have parents like
Jared and I do, but everyone around here knows how to say “please” and “thank
you.” Technology makes it even easier. Whether it’s a kind word or $100, I
always want people to know that I appreciate what they’ve done for me. Having
said that, maybe you’ll understand why I feel strongly about this topic.
As school time draws near, we
will probably see people and groups asking for donations for school supplies. I
beg you to be cautious in doing so. I actually encourage you to donate to a
trustworthy teacher rather than to a random drive or even hosting a random
drive to donate to random people. As much as we would like to think that “needy”
people are just oh so thankful for the good-hearted people out there, it has
been my experience that they are not. They expect it and do not appreciate it.
I’ve mentioned before that I taught school for 12 years, and until November of
the 13th. The first three years were in a prestigious Catholic high
school, eight were in a public city school, and a year and a half were in a public
county school. For the first 11 years, I would keep extra pencils and paper in
my room in case a student needed it. My mom frequents Mobile and Birmingham, so
she would buy cute sticky notes, pencils, decorations, etc. for my classroom. I
enjoyed using them in class, and the students were always thankful. I run races,
so I have a zillion t-shirts. Every now and then, I would bring the extras to
school and let the kids have one each, first come, first served. Even though
most of the kids weren’t needy, they were always appreciative. Many of them
would get a shirt for their mom or a sibling. Teaching kids like that makes you
want to do nice things for them. I left that school 99% because of a bad administrator,
and 1% because my season as a teacher was coming to an end. Had I known about
the culture of the county school down the road, however, I would have stayed. When
I did this at the last school, most of the kids asked “why do you think we
would want this” and I ended up bringing a lot of it home.
When I say the things I’m about
to say, please understand that I am not overgeneralizing. Thank goodness there were some sweet kids and parents! I don’t believe in overgeneralizing, and I don’t want someone to assume things about me just because of my demographics,
alma mater, favorite college team, etc. However, most (not all) of the students
I taught at the last school had no interest in learning, were totally unappreciative
of the things people did for them, and had no accountability for their own
actions. Because of the poverty,
every student received free food. You would find it in the garbage, on the
floor in my classroom, smashed between the pages in textbooks, in the
containers where markers were stored, on the floor in the cafeteria during
lunch, etc. Also, the government forces the cafeteria workers to put the food
on the plate even if the student doesn’t want it. I didn’t see wasted food. I
saw tax dollars of hard-working Americans being wasted every day.
Before I knew about the entitlement
and waste, I kept wooden pencils and extra paper in case a student forgot his/hers
or ran out. On more than one occasion, students would break the wooden pencils
I gave them in my face and say they wanted a mechanical pencil. On the first
day of school my first year there as I was going over my very frugal list of
supplies, one child told me that his mother said his teacher could buy all that
if he needed it so bad(ly).
The second year, a group of which
my parents is a part hosted a school supply drive. These sweet, hard working
people went out and bought school supplies to donate to people they thought
needed them and would appreciate them. I was coaching at the time, and we were
at summer practice. One of the players was talking about wanting a new Michael
Kors purse, a new hair style, and a new set of nails. Another girl on the team
said “just go up to that 'group' and get your school stuff for free, then you can
get all that stuff you want.” If my parents and their friends had been robbed
at gunpoint, I wouldn’t have felt any differently. Those are all nice things,
and there’s nothing wrong with wanting them. However, you don’t get to have
those things if you can’t afford them. If you want them, you work for them. You
don’t steal from truly needy people and from non-profit organizations so you
can have the finer things in life.
In an effort to boost morale on
the team, I would go to a very nice boutique in town and buy small gifts as door
prizes. I would find them left on the table after practice. It was
heartbreaking to me. I had gone out of my way, spent my hard-earned money, and
they didn’t care enough or have enough respect and appreciation to even take them
home. They just left them there for me to find. That team also deliberately ruined a fundraiser, and none of the parents volunteered or participated. My friends & I did it all. It could have been a huge success.
I see posts on Facebook about
teachers not having enough money for their classrooms. I can’t speak for
elementary teachers, but I always received about $400 annually. That was plenty
for classroom supplies. If I ever spent my own money, it was on something extra
I wanted to do. At the county school, we had to clean our own classrooms, and
most of the students didn’t bring paper towels, tissues, and hand sanitizer as
requested. I bought those things. The classroom didn’t come with some of the
things I needed for janitorial purposes, and instructional money wasn’t
approved to cover them, so I had to purchase them or do without.
After my experiences as a
teacher, there are some schools that will never see one cent of my money
because the students are so unappreciative. There are others that I will donate
to every time I’m asked. Also, after having seen how some parents and students
have a hand out and take advantage of generous people and organizations, I will
not host school supply drives or blindly give. I will make sure I know where my
hard-earned money is going. I will give to a teacher I trust so he/she can
responsibly make sure it is used by those who truly need it. Those who don’t
truly need it are stealing from those who donated it and from those who do
truly need it. I hope this didn’t leave you with the impression that I am a
cold-hearted, stingy person, but I was absolutely disgusted by what I saw. I
want to help those who need it. I want to defend them from those who don’t. Prior
to my experience at this last school, I didn’t realize how much the system is
worked. I hope this will also open eyes to that. Whether it’s school supplies,
food drives, or whatever the case may be, make sure you as giving people are
not being duped.
Also, the first week of school is
exhausting for teachers. There is a local church who provides dinner for teachers’
families the first week of school. That is awesome! If I were a better cook, I
would do that! A gift card to Pizza Hut is probably a better idea for me to give, though,
lol. If you don’t already, please teach your kids to say please and thank you.
Please teach them to write thank you notes. Please teach them thank you note
etiquette for graduation, wedding showers, etc. It goes a long way and people
remember it!
